Reflecting on Sweetness
By ND Johnson
My film Sweetness
follows Tara, a black trans woman, who survives the night by learning what it means to fight to be the woman she is even when those she cherishes most seem to turn on her. She’s been in a loving relationship with Marcus, a proud black man, for the last three years but begins to question their validity when she meets a young trans girl in need of a little help.
I am creating this film because as a black trans fem person, the only narratives I see in the headlines are obituaries and remembrance posts about black trans women who have been slaughtered at the hands of men who claim to love us. We are a resilient group of people who have survived countless attacks, personal vendettas, and transphobia daily. Yet, we fight, we survive and we thrive.
Toxic masculinity has destroyed entire communities and snatched so many beautiful lives away from this world. We cannot allow that to happen any longer. To the men who love us in the shadows, enough is enough. We are not secrets. We do not belong in the dark and your shame is killing us! Let it be known that we are not easy pickings. We are not fetishes or toys or punching bags for your transphobic rhetoric and violence. We are human beings and we demand to be treated as such.
Since 2018 over 70 trans and gender-nonconforming people’s lives have been taken in this country as a product of hate, shame, and internalized transphobia, and the count continues to rise. 70 beautiful lives lost at the hands of police brutality, domestic abuse, and random acts of violence against trans people trying to live their lives.
To my trans fem community: know that we are strong and have and will continue to live beyond the challenges society throws at us, but we must fight. We must make an active decision to protect ourselves and love ourselves over a partnership. We must seek beauty and vitality in a community with resilient healing practices. This is not the end for us. Cis-heterosexual people will not wipe us out nor will the gays and queers with deep-seated transphobia and shame coursing through their veins.
Let this film serve as a reminder that our stories of resilience and perseverance matter. Help us shape the next generation of narratives for black trans bodies who deserve to walk in this world the same as you. The conversation starts with you but that is certainly not where it ends.
Visionary Justice Storylab is doing all it can to be a part of the solution through their Resisting Narratives of Erasure Series, specifically highlighting queer and trans filmmakers of color. They recognize how often we are left out of the creative process and how that leads to toxic, stereotypical narratives that are used to shun our communities and eventually paves the way for real-world violence.
This short film represents the challenges and fears many trans people face when embarking on intimate relationships but in an experimental and almost horror-like fashion. It speaks to the complexities of desiring love and affection and what some feel they must sacrifice to obtain it.
My process with Visionary Justice Storylab has been one of the best film cohort experiences I have had. Not only did I get a chance to collaborate with amazing artists but they offered mentorship and resources to encourage our various visions and nurture our creativity. I am very appreciative for this experience because Visionary Justice Storylab is doing the very thing I want to do- uniting QTPOC filmmakers to tell our own stories. I am thankful and grateful for the opportunity to work with other QTPOC artists to bring Sweetness: Proof of Concept to life.
We will be launching our crowdfunding campaign in 2021 to create our film. Aid us in raising $35,000 to make a movie that will help pave the way for a different future.
You can follow ND on Instagram at @_ndpendent.